June 9, 2014
Nevada City, CA
Diane’s and my second anniversary today; she is in France with the WWII veterans and their families for the 70th reunion of D-day and I am at home, keeping the cats and chickens company.
I haven’t written my blog for a long time, as I have had little that was a “problem” to deal with. My usual modus operandi being that I would share how I resolved the upset. However with fewer and fewer upsets, and living more and more in the reality that this is it, it has dawned on me that my normal life is enormously satisfying just the way it is. So I am writing about that, a happy new phase in my life.
I am married to the woman of my dreams, I live where I want to live, do what I want to do, and the only thing missing is for me to find more ways to contribute to others and it would be nice if I was bringing in some money. But we have enough money, so even that area is not a source of concern, just an area of intention.
I guess in fairness, I should mention that I have some aches and pains in my body, and of course it would be nice if they disappeared, but they have come from a very active and wonderful life, so they seem to come with the territory of being 71 and I am not burdened by them, just work around them.
Diane and I have been participating in a course about money, how we spend it, save it and make it and it has brought up some deep conversations mostly based on childhood programming and some later life experiences. We are doing this so that we are on the same page about money. People say that most arguments in marriages are about sex or money. Sex has been so good, we wanted money to be just as easy and nurturing, hence the course.
In the process of doing this course on money which has really brought up every aspect of our life, “what do you want in this or that domain and how are you going to get it?” Mostly I realize that I have what I want and if I had buckets full of money I would still choose this life. What I really need to practice is appreciation. I am unpracticed in living in gratitude given that most of my life has had the undercurrent of “this isn’t it.” So I declare I am alive, happy, and prosperous.
I have also realized that in my relationship with Diane, there isn’t any subject that isn’t readily available for communication, nor an area in which we have any basic differences. The process we have gone through to get us to where we are, has cleared out all those potential areas of conflict. So now I find myself living with a partner in a transparent, open, and responsible relationship. Transparent to each other, open to any conversation, and each of us responsible for our experience. It is wonderful.
So now the ordinary is wonderful. We look forward to finding upsets and subtle aspects of life that throw us off and take us out of present time. It is an adventure of discovery, because we know that anything we can discover becomes the doorway to deeper connection, more time spent in a kind of mindless, experiential state, and more freedom to be ourselves, loved and accepted by the other.
Now we would love to be able to share this methodology with others. It is a guaranteed method for making a relationship work, if both people are genuinely committed to personal growth and enlightenment. It kind of turns your relationship into the space of an ashram with all the benefits of a loving relationship. So that is our challenge at the moment, how to get the word out there in a way that people understand what is possible for them.
I hope this blog finds my reader happy.
All the best,